I am going to tell a story. A story that many students in University of Hyderabad can probably relate to. But, before I begin, I want to make a few things clear. After a relentless struggle, I have now achieved what I fought for. Now I am a PhD scholar in Department of Telugu. So, in order to avoid repercussions, I will be careful enough to avoid names of the people who discriminated against me. I was born in a remote village in Vikarabad of Ranga Reddy district in Telangana. Born into a poor Dalit family, I studied in government schools till my intermediate. I passed final exams of both 10th class and intermediate with over 80 per cent.
Later, I joined the UoH for Integrated Master’s Programme. I started learning about my rights and asserting my identity. As I was about to complete my degree, I began to feel the heat of caste discrimination. I qualified NET in my fourth semester. Later, I qualified for the Junior Research Fellowship (JRF). I also finished my Master’s with a score of over 80 per cent. From here things turned really difficult for me. My caste became a hurdle and discrimination pushed me to even approach National Commission for SC and ST.
For a normal student with a JRF, M. Phil admission is a cakewalk. But, when I applied, they refused to admit me. The reason I still believe is because I belonged to a lower cast. I had no money to survive because I was already an orphan. I took up a job with a vernacular newspaper in Hyderabad. I lost a year despite appeals. The next year, in 2012, I joined M.Phil after fighting a lot of odds. I finished my dissertation a year later, and got the highest score. But the worst was yet to happen.
When I applied for PhD, I was again refused admission. I approached the faculty concerned to find out the reason. The person told me on my face, “I will not give you a seat here”. But I did not give up. I went again, this time begging to take me in. But, nothing changed. I heard they did not like the students who asserted their identity. They also did not like students, who were politically active.
Things were worse in Department of Telugu then. A student committed suicide and another attempted suicide due to humiliation.
I too was succumbing to the darkest fear I had never felt before. I went to my room and remained there for three days with overwhelming suicidal thoughts. I don’t know what would have happened if my friends from Ambedkar Students Association had not helped me out. They joined me in my struggle. One day, when a national seminar was going on in Department of Telugu, the ASA cadres went in. Protesting caste discrimination, they questioned the faculty. The people concerned did what they had planned to do. They called the police and we were forced out. I later heard that the then Vice-Chancellor even asked the staff concerned to take me in. But still nothing changed.
I knocked on the doors of National Commission for SC & ST. They responded positively writing a letter to the department. But by then I had already lost a year. I could have joined Osmania University for a PhD. But the fact that I was denied the opportunity in UoH frustated me. Finally, after an year of struggle, they took me in.
The writer is a Dalit PhD Scholar
