Andhra Pradesh: Police advice on sex draws flak

VIJAYAWADA: “Weave love, sex, and romance into the fabric of your daily lives and see the difference” is what the Vijayawada police advise married partners to keep their relation healthy and alive.

The eight-point advisory under the “Affair-proof Relationship” column in the “Ladies Special” page of the Vijayawada Commissionerate’s official website enlightens married partners, particularly women, how to understand and overcome the troubles in their married lives.

Though the tips in the advisory apply to both sexes, they have been placed in the “Ladies Special” page meant for women who are mostly the victims of marital affairs.

Vijayawada is known for crimes against women and the rate of disputes between wife and husbands too is high. A couple of incidents wherein wives have committed suicide after being ignored by their husbands prove the same.

In the rural areas, there have been a number of cases wherein men have committed suicide after being ignored by their wives. To avoid such cases, the advisory by the police department might be a solution.

However, the tips – be your partner’s best friend, do not let problems go unresolved, keep your partner among top three priorities, let the infatuation fade but keep the passion alive, don’t nag, spend time together and don’t martyr yourself for partner’s sake – are acceptable.

The tip “make love often”, however, is not acceptable by psychologists and women activists.

“Making love often does not contribute to a good relationship. In fact, it cannot even be one of the factors contributing to a healthy relationship, there are many other areas that need to be concentrated on. In many families, making love has become a common need like food, sleep etc. Partners who are living together since decades do not make love often but still they maintain a lovely relationship”, said Dr V. Sadanandam, a psychologist and member of Jana Vignana Vedika.

State secretary of Stree Vimukti Sanghatana, M. Lakshmi, said that change should be brought in the society rather between couples.

“A woman cannot stop her husband from looking for other women by making love often. There should be pure love between the couple. In fact, having affairs with many women have become prestigious among some groups of men these days. This attitude must be changed”, she said.

“Both, the wife and husband should feel equally responsible for each other, if women alone are held responsible for maintaining a relationship, then it is an indication that women are being pushed to olden days where they were asked to look attractive for their husbands when he would return from office,” Ms Lakshmi added.

A top commissionerate cop said that the website was uploaded long ago and many from the department were unaware of its contents. However, he said that they would only advise partners to maintain healthy relationships to avoid negative consequences.