I am not so likeable: Parvathy Menon
Parvathy is bothered by categorisations of gender, of the ‘Menon’ tag and of sexism becoming a norm in movies
By : cris
Update: 2015-11-26 06:38 GMT
Parvathy’s hands itch to take away the name board in front of her. It has a last name in it she has been running away from for a long time. But then she is introduced again as ‘Parvathy Menon’, cine actress and social activist, at a women police conference in Thiruvananthapuram. Left to her, she would have removed not only her last name but also the ‘women’ out of the women police conference, and reintroduced herself as ‘Parvathy, a person’.“I am a lot of things, not just an actor or an activist.” She tells the women police to explore that side where they are not just one thing but many, to forget the gender and introduce themselves as a police officer, without the ‘female’ prefix.
Categorisations have always bothered Parvathy, she says, in an interview post the conference. Perhaps this need to stay out of labels is what makes her get out and get away as soon as work of a movie is over. “I have to get out of that space, do regular things like walk or take a bus or be quiet or get sick!” She has gone backpacking by herself through Europe soon after work of Ennu Ninte Moideen was over, but after going for a theatre workshop.
“The last day, at 9.30 from Shoranur, I went straight to Pondicherry for the workshop led by Tim Supple. Eleven days there made me realise I am still quite mediocre as an actor,” says the actor who has been praised a lot for her character as Kanchanamala. “I am happy about the success of the film but I am detached from it. People attribute the good qualities they see in my characters to me. But I am no Kanchanamala, no Sarah (Bangalore Days), I am not so likeable,” she laughs.
But her characters do leave something behind for her. Panimalar (character in Mariyan) taught her that it is alright to be vulnerable. Sarah taught her the difference between fearlessness and courage, and that it was stupid to be fearless. She is yet to figure out what her newest character Tessa D’souza from Charlie has left behind. “Charlie is Martin Prakkat’s fantasy land and it was the best way to break away from Moideen. Tessa is a gypsy soul, who is difficult to understand. She is like water, flowing endlessly, quite different from what I am. I am a control freak, maybe I will learn to flow.”
She also calls herself a feminist, realising that the very word is misunderstood, and invites a truckload of prejudice. “The real definition was humanism, equality of all sexes but over the years it’s come to mean extremism.”
At the conference, she shares her experience of being called a feminist, when she started speaking out about her work. “Society is scared of people they don’t know what to do with.”
But she is no longer in an age when she wants to blame others for what is wrong but do something about it. She has just got back from the ‘Women in the World’ summit in New Delhi. She has attended the conference on gender equality in Kovalam a few days ago. On Wednesday, she has taken part in a walkathon as part of the Orange Day campaign to mark the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against women in Thiruvananthapuram.
“We have become comfortably numb with a lot of things around us, including sexism. Films have a huge role to play in this. When films make a comedy out of such acts, as stalking a woman or hitting her behind, and it becomes a norm, and when those films become hits, I am scared for society.”
In the films that come to her, she tries to talk to the makers to avoid such scenes, but few take her seriously. “I have decided not to be a part of such movies anymore. There’s a difference between reflection of the sexist society that we live in and the glorification of it. There has to be a proper message in the movie while it remains entertaining.” She will give out a proper message when she adopts her family name and become ‘Parvathy Thiruvoth Kottuvatta’, dropping the casteist Menon tag, in the days to come.
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