Unhappy Gen-Z Scout For Love Old School Way

After a decade of swiping left and right on dating apps, many Gen-Z users are now drifting away from the pool of “plenty fish” to old-school methods of dating. GenZers (18-27 years) were the first generation to be born with smartphones, high-speed browsing and dating apps. However, the interest in dating apps has withered significantly. Dr Swapna Patker, Founder, Dream & Happiness, Life & Relationship Coach, Mumbai feels that many people speak to 10 people on dating apps at the same time. “You are talking in the same manner to all the 10 people. This takes away the genuine approach one needs to have while coming to such apps,” she says, adding, “Also, the lack of connection and above all, genuine conduct.” There have been instances of married men, who are perhaps having troubled relationships coming for random hookups on dating apps. They fabricate facts about their marriage and age.

FB & Insta Craze

According to the findings of the Forbes Health Survey 2024, a staggering 79% of Gen-Z daters were feeling fatigued by dating apps. The percentage of fatigue further being bifurcated as follows: Gen-Z (79%), followed by Mill-ennials (80%), Gen-X (77%) and Baby Boomers (70%). Rea-sons for the same being that out of the 79%, there were 40% who experienced extre-me burnout fuelled by a need to strike a genuine connection. Many youngsters are switching over from dating apps to other alternatives like Instagram or Facebook. Apart from giving you a profile of the person, these platforms also give a peek into the individual’s daily world.

Dr Swapna says, “People will lie on FB and Insta too, but most users have a timeline of events with pictures behind them. Creating a lie that supports all those picture uploads from the past so many years would be difficult. FB and Instagram introduce you to a person’s world quickly compared to dating apps.”

Matter of Heart

Kshitiz and Shivangi, a couple who are Content Creators and Influencers, say that the need for validation is one of the main reasons people join dating apps. “They need someone to connect with and share their experiences,” they say. Speaking about how users need to be genuine to have a real experience on dating apps, Kshitiz and Shivangi say, “We feel it depends on each user’s experience. We do know of people who have met on dating apps and are now in a happy relationship. It all depends on how you approach it and what you make of it.” On dating apps, a person is not bound to the other person in any manner. “There are many people who go to Bumble or Tinder when they’re in a depressive state of mind, and once they feel a little better, they’re off it. Loneliness is the biggest problem today,” explains Dr Swapna. Many dating app users seem to fabricate information when it comes to personal details, especially age. “Financial frauds are a new upcoming problem. Sometimes a man or a woman gets friendly with the other and asks for money after a point,” she says. There have been numerous cases where women who met via dating apps have falsely accused a man of ‘rape’ even without meeting him.

Gen-Z’s Voice Out

Sanya Chandel, a media graduate from Mumbai says that many GenZers have become open to traditional relationships as compared to the more 'open' type relationships. “Dating apps have primarily become a ‘transactional thing’ where most people only aim to meet or have a conversation if it's regarding hooking up,” says Sanya. She has been ghosted by many because she refused to engage in sexual encounters. She quips, “I don't have enough fingers to count the number of times I've been harassed by men on dating apps.” The dating culture has now been translated into a ‘fast culture.’ However, security remains a big issue. “Especially Hinge because it (Hinge) deletes all private data after unmatching/deleting an account. It deletes all traces of any conversation. Any person who has ill intentions could easily vanish and the police won't be able to track them down” says Udit Anand, an engineering student.

Dating Apps Speak

While the Gen-Z have voiced their concerns, dating app companies are striving to make the dating experience better and safer for users. Papri Dev, VP of Communications, APAC at Tinder says, “It is not the apps that Gen-Z are questioning, its dating and its traditions.” Dev further adds, “For us at Tinder, our work continues to make dating the best that it can be by innovating and creating features that the young adults of today want.” Dev also shares how Tinder is quite considerate in terms of understanding that a real connection would only be possible in an environment that supports safety, authenticity, and community. Dev adds, “Safety is part of our DNA and we’re always working in close collaboration with different NGOs to improve the dating experience for our users.''

Bumble emphasises that they are working on educating members about healthy dating habits by launching ‘Warnings’ and ‘Safety Centre’ features. A Bumble spokesperson says, “We’re introducing new ways to make the first move which offers more choice in how women connect while staying in control. This evolution is a reflection of our community feedback, and it’s the first of many exciting updates we are making to address our community’s needs, and make dating better for women, both online and offline.” Bumble stressed that one thing shall never change – their commitment to keep women first and prioritise their safety. The spokesperson adds, “We will continue to advocate for accountability, kindness, respect and inclusivity both online and offline.”

The Way Ahead

While it may be perceived as a counterintuitive move for Gen-Z to walk out of digital dating spaces into the actual world of in-person meetups, signs today point to exactly this. Gen-Z daters seem to now venture out to meet people to date, much far from the hypothetical swiping world that dating apps have to offer. Perhaps, the dating culture will evolve, but only time will tell if it will keep Gen-Z hooked!

The need for validation is one of the main reasons people join any dating app” — Kshitiz and Shivangi, Couple, Content Creators and Influencers

It is not the apps that Gen-Z are questioning, its dating and its traditions.” — Papri Dev, VP, Communications, APAC, Tinder

We will continue to advocate for accountability, kindness, respect and inclusivity both online and offline.” — Bumble, Spokesperson

I don't have enough fingers to count the number of times I've been harassed by men on dating apps” — Sanya Chandel, Media Graduate