Chennai: Emotional gap between parents and kids leads to emotional disorders, which may turn them to indulge in anti-social activities or create health issues like ‘emotional eating disorder’ that ultimately causes obesity.
Parents should speak to kids, have well-defined rules at home, and invest in time and love, not on material possessions say psychologists. “With peers having high-end gadgets and phones, kids place demands with parents. If kids have been given phones, parents must also monitor the time the kids spend with such gadgets,” said counseling psychologist B. Elayaraja.
He added that parents should spend quality time with kids. “Kids should also know what is happening in the parents’ lives. Parents should be clear in telling the kids that gadgets are a means to kill time, not a replacement for parent’s love,” he added,
“There is this family I know which has no Pogo channel on their TV. The parents play with the kid a lot, so the kid doesn’t look forward to watching TV or playing games on phones,” he recounted. Psychology experts feel that a child’s anti-social behavior culminates from multiple factors.
“The acceptance, attention and affection that a child gets at home plays a role in determining how he sees the world,” said Dr M. Suresh Kumar explaining the statement ‘a child is the biopsy of the family.’
“During adolescence, a child continuously seeks approval. It might come from a peer group in the form of encouragement for misdeeds. He might think his behaving in a rebellious manner or having a particular gadget makes him look good in their eyes and gains their acceptance,” he continued.
Parents and community should work for behavioral correction together. At an age when instant gratification is sought by children, they should be explained the value of everything, and not all demands should be fulfilled. “Once a child clings to one material thing, he needs another once he is bored of the former. This creates a taste of materialism in children,” he added. “The importance of instilling values in children from a young age is a must.”
He added that while parents should not be acerbic for the pettiest of mistakes, but they should ensure that discipline is exercised consistently. “If a child steals brings home a pencil that is not his, he should be given a proper telling off every time he does it. If you shout at him once, and don’t say anything the next four times, the child will be confused between the wrong acts and the right,” he said.
