Is infidelity in the blood?
Bangalore tops when it comes to infidelity, followed by Mumbai, Kolkata and Delhi. A recent survey shows how infidelity is a growing concern in India not just in metro cities but also in tier 2 and 3 cities and small towns as well.
In India infidelity is treated in a very subjective manner. Here men are often forgiven while women are always condemned. Women hardly have a say on their sexual desires, wanting and cravings. The fact that a woman could also need satisfaction is her sexual life is mostly ignored.
In many instances, their male counterparts to fulfill their own selfish desires treat women like a commodity.If by any means, a woman raises her voice or goes out of the relation to fulfill her needs and desires, it's considered a taboo.
Infidelity is prominent in society since ages; it's just that people are oblivious to its presence. The so-called taboo in the Indian cultural society has taken a leap of faith since the inception of apps like Gleeden; which has not only catered to the needs of the longing women of the society but has also helped in sparkling their monotonous and dominant life. It hosts an army of 5 lakh Indian users out of which 30% are females and this constant growth of community mirrors the evolution of Indian current society in which infidelity will no longer be considered a taboo in the nearby future. So much so that other social apps like Meetups, Facebook, Instagram have similar interested communities as closed groups.
If infidelity manages to surpass the ‘taboo’ tag, a major section of the society can breathe easily.
However, in this context, a question arises if infidelity is so prominent, is it inherited?
According to recent surveys and studies about different topics concerning love, sex, and relationships, 46% of unfaithful people come from families where one parent has a history of cheating on the other.
Single women tend to put out later than married women who cheat according to Gleeden. Fifty per cent of unfaithful women go to fourth base on the second date highlighting the fact they are sexually adventurous and confident.
A married woman on an extramarital dating site is likely sexually uninhibited, confident, and has prowess. Concerning men who are unfaithful, 17 per cent have a separate bank account they use to manage expenses related to their affair.
Studies reveal that, in India, cheating isn't restricted to metro cities. Many members of extramarital dating sites live in tier 2 and tier 3 cities where taboos against infidelity, despite its legalization, are strong. Smaller cities in the countries hinterland are generally very conservative, however, societal taboos there are breaking as men and women register on extramarital dating sites.
While outside India the numbers of members on extramarital dating sites is in the millions, in India where familiarity with technology is low and societal taboos persist, the numbers are in the hundreds of thousands.
Importantly, while a significant number of women registered on extramarital dating sites live in tier 2 and tier 3 cities, the majority of women members live in tier 1 cities where anonymity is easier and cultural taboos are their weakest.
Also, researchers at Queensland University in Australia identified in 2015 a specific gene in women that could be responsible for this infidelity.
Known as AVPR1A, it produces a hormone called “arginine vasopressin”, which affects social behavior and attachment between sexual partners.
But even if the gene responsible for infidelity is yet to be studied in detail, it’s safer to say that infidelity can be hereditary. Or at least, Gleeden’s study seems to prove so.
Nevertheless, we need to remind ourselves that infidelity is always the signal of something bigger going on within the couple, especially the lack of something (love, desire, attention, etc.) that are then pursued elsewhere.
Genetics alone doesn’t fully explain the reasons for infidelity; it often has roots in more complicated sentimental situations too.