As the clock struck midnight on the New Year’s Eve in Bengaluru, and even as the world was celebrating the arrival of a new year, women on the lanes of MG Road and Brigade Road, had to go through trauma that reminded the country of the deep-rooted patriarchy in our society and how no city is really safe.
A huge group of men (numbered in hundreds, the eyewitnesses recounted in various reports) began groping the women — it was almost like a state of anarchy from the videos, where even the police who were around didn’t do much.
As many of these ladies have been coming out and speaking up about the horrific night, a certain set of social media has also been filling itself up with the argument that “#NotAllMen in the city are rapists or molesters,” thereby, skirting the issue and the trauma these women had to go through. This hashtag on social media, which has been used many times earlier to belittle sexual assault, has divided opinion into two halves — the ones supporting this argument of men, and those against it. As Chennai too joins in this debate, here’s what people from different walks of life have to say.
Rapper and activist Sofia Ashraf says the trending hashtag #NotAllMen is one of the most degenerative trends that a modern society can see. “The hashtag proves that men are so insecure that they need to use such an argument to dilute the issue. Yes, not all men are rapists, but definitely, enough men are rapists and are molesting and harassing women in the country. A lot of the ‘liberated class’ in our country today lives in echo chambers and think that women have all the freedom, but the reality is that 85-90 percent of them believe in that with a patriarchal mindset. Most of the women are shocked at this incident, but it is just a manifestation of the reality. A lot of women have to deal with incidents like these nearly every day, which shows that we as a country are living in denial. We think that Bengaluru is safe, or Chennai is safe, but incidents like these bring the real issue to the foreground. The hashtag just means that men are uncomfortable with women voicing out their opinions,” she asserts.
Bengaluru-based Jasmeen Patheja, the founder of a volunteer-led initiative, Blank Noise, is planning a response to the incident, along with volunteers. In response to ministers blaming it on women’s clothing for being molested, Jasmeen is also exhibiting garments, that women were molested in, at public sites, under the name, ‘I Never Ask For It’.
She adds, “Of course, not all men commit violence against women, but many women and girls are warned often by many men (brothers, fathers, husband, ‘protectors’) and the society at large to fear another man, to “be careful”, ie., to be careful of another man. Before this goes into a man vs woman reductionist view, let’s try and examine this as a societal, patriarchal issue and concern. In an environment in collective outrage and shock after the New Year’s Eve incident, #NotAllMen is defensive, and this is not a time to be defensive, but to understand, empathise and step in. This is the time to take collective responsibility.”
Actor Rahul Ravindran says, “There is a time and place for everything and I don’t think this is the time for such a particular hashtag. It deflects the attention and dilutes the whole issue.” He adds, “I’d like to believe that the overwhelming majority of Indian men are cultured and don’t view women as sex objects. But, it’s a sad truth that men like these walk amongst us and it is high time we highlight what happened and make sure that it doesn’t happen again. I don’t think anybody is making the assumption that all men are molesters. The incident is shocking and extremely shameful. There is absolutely no excuse for such a behaviour just because you are a little drunk and it’s NYE. Also, the laws must be very strict. It should act fast and shouldn’t let people walk away scot-free.”
While actress Akshara Haasan claims that the incident was definitely a violation of personal space for women, she adds, “A certain section of the society saying #NotAllMen molest is like two sides of a coin — a negative side which one can’t avoid. There’s always a different right to every wrong.” Akshara also says she is thankful that she never had to get into any such situation where her rights were compromised and hopes she never will.
Hotelier Vikram Cotah believes that such crude behaviour shows the lack of respect towards women. “I don’t know why people are focused on this hashtag and diverting the attention. Shouldn’t the real issue be addressed now? Rather than pushing it under the rug, let’s talk about it and bring the culprits to book. Also, the sexist remarks openly passed by the netas show how a few people are trying to shift the focus.”
PS Raman, former Advocate-General of Tamil Nadu, states, “Social media is a lovely medium to shoot out a good message. But at the same time, some awful things, in this case, the hashtag #NotAllMen, starts trending. Somebody started using #NotAllMen hashtag and it might have caught somebody’s fancy. This hashtag is pointless, instead the matter about women’s safety is more important. It can just heat up the debate, and people tend to forget the whole incident happened in Bengaluru. That said, the police also should have been on alert on days like NYE and other festivals.” This trend, as a Twitter user @PedastrianPoet says, only seems to prove that #NotAllMen have a sense of perspective when it comes to crimes dealing with sexual assault.
