There is a debate raging online about one simple question — do single fathers get enough credit? They keep their jobs, handle the day-to-day activities, pay the bills, make the school run and still find time for some fun!
The start can be for different reasons, and is not always easy. One Brad Kearns from Australia wrote about his ‘mum-for-a-day’ experience and that note went on to become an Internet hit. His life changed in a split second when he received this text from his wife — “My liver has failed.”As he rushed home from work, reality struck: the roles had been reversed and it was his time to be the mum and take on the sleepless nights, the feeding, and the toilet training by himself.
Single dads and their stories
Aditya Tiwari, a 28-year-old software engineer based in Pune, is the youngest single man to have adopted a child in India. He is currently on a two-month-long adoption leave from work. “Parenting is challenging, but the bottomline is love, care, and affection,” he says. His kid, little Avinash, has Down syndrome and a hole in his heart, and so needs constant care. “When I was working, my parents would take care of Avinash until I came home. But now that I have a lot of time, we both have been travelling a lot.”
Dr. K. Prashant, Consultant Clinical Psychologist, explains why it’s so hilarious to watch single dads go about their day — and why things often go wrong. “As the saying goes, ‘men live longer if they’re married’. Mollycoddled throughout their lives, men are at a disadvantage when it comes to fulfilling the nurturing and emotional needs of a family member. If the child complains, the father retorts and then they end up fighting like little kids. Most men don’t perform as well as their female counterparts,” says Dr Prashant.
Hrithik’s adventures with his sons
With summer vacations on, Hrithik Roshan’s sons Hrehaan and Hridaan are spending time with their father. And the actor has made elaborate holiday plans for them.
The fun begins when the kids accompany their dad to IIFA in Madrid in the last week of June. From there, the “three boys”, as Hrithik and his sons like to call themselves, have planned the most amazing adventure holiday to some of the most exotic places in the world.
Revealing his holiday plans, Hrithik says, “First I am taking them to see my performance at IIFA. Then we’re going to the Serengeti National Park in Tanzania. Then we will explore Venice. Finally we will meet Sussanne in London.”
Not only does the trio travel together extensively, but Hrithik has also filmed all their adventures abroad. He adds, “That’s right. I make a movie out of every trip of ours. Shot and edited with background score and all. All done by me on my phone.”
Being a single parent was tough: Arvind Swamy
Actor Arvind Swamy brought up his kids as a single parent. Given his profession, it was anything but easy. He says, “I have nurtured my kids by myself. I am happy that I invested those 10 years in bringing them up. Now I have time for myself, as my daughter is 19 and my son is able to take care of himself.”
“While bringing up my kids, I had to strike a balance between being strict and maintaining my cool. While dealing with children, it’s very important to talk to them about what they would like to do. I might not have liked certain activities of theirs, but I wasn’t harsh with them. They discussed everything that was happening in their lives. Kids may say something rude, but after a few hours they don’t even remember it…they easily forget and forgive.”
(With inputs from Lipika Varma and Subhash K. Jha)
