Decades ago when The Beatles sang Can’t Buy Me Love, many young and idealistic folks fell for the enchanting idea. But it didn’t take very long for the utopian dreams to come crashing down.
When young you can always hum I don’t care too much for money / and money can't buy me love and feel good, but eventually you have to fall in line and queue up for lucrative careers to financially afford binge shopping, that brings happiness.
Making and spending money in the pre-liberalised India were almost a sin. But not any longer. The new mantra of the millennial generation is that shopping sprees can actually make us all happy. A can of cola now says you are opening “happiness” — a claim that directly links a purchase to a smile.
New research on happiness and material possessions done abroad seem to be validating this. If the retailers are laughing all the way to the bank, the diehard shoppers are not left behind. They are just laughing all the way into posh homes in the tony parts of town.
The old-timers, the parents and uncles, are yet to come to terms with this new generation and its idea of happiness. Like the psychologists of the past who seemed to have been under the influence of Zen philosophy and minimalist lifestyle, people belonging to the earlier generations still harp on about experiences and how they are (or were) the main source of happiness. They also express contempt and disdain at the idea of material possessions making people happy.
Psychologist Saras Bhaskar says, “Happiness is subjective and it can be found in both materialistic and non-materialistic sources. For either, one must find happiness within first.” The idea of happiness is dynamic, not cast in stone. There’s no point in being dogmatic and judgmental too. In fact, that itself can be a source of unhappiness. Also, variety is the spice and marketing gurus thrive on it. Just look at the variations, the myriad brands cramming the shelves of large-format stores. Naturally, the idea of happiness can be different for different generations, for people of different nations, societies, cultural, socio-economic backgrounds, so on and so forth. Different strokes for different folks. “Even within an individual, the idea of happiness can change with time and phases of life,” adds Ms Bhaskar.
As the world becomes more materialistic, people’s idea of happiness gets tuned to it. While experiences may or may not cost money, most material things do. And that has motivated us to work as slaves or slave-drivers. Both want to slog long hours so that they could afford all those wonderful, happiness-causing things. However, what can make you happy can also be a source of profound unhappiness when you fail miserably. “At the very least such failures can cause burnout,” says Ms Bhaskar.
Ironically, even those who want to sell things are often forced to contrast material happiness with “some things money can’t buy” because according to that ad, there’s a plastic card for “everything money can’t buy”.
The writer teaches journalism at a college in Chennai
