The latest viral challenge to hit social media networks is the Motherhood Dare — mums posting photographs of themselves with their children, and write about how it’s a blessing to choose to be a mother. People then tag other mums who they think are “fabulous, strong and gorgeous” enough to rise to the challenge.
Thousands of these posts have gone up, each with adorable photos of mums with their kids.
But strong voices opposing the dare have surfaced online as well, calling the “challenge” sexist and event patriarchal — reinforcing the stereotype that women were only born to be mothers, and even being derogatory towards women who choose not to (and those who can’t) have kids themselves.
Says Hyderabadi mother Radhika Rao, who posted a collage of herself with her two sons on Facebook, “It was my choice to have children and embrace motherhood, and those who don’t want to have children, it’s their choice too. It’s not saying anything bad against them at all,” she says, adding, “Look at the Ice Bucket Challenge; people did it for spreading awareness about the ALS disease, but then it just went on to become something completely different. This motherhood challenge is nothing more than just accepting that you’re a mother.”
But doesn’t the challenge, in fact, reinforce patriarchal stereotypes on women?
Dr Divya Sudarsha, a gynecologist from the city and a mother herself says that it all boils down to the personal choice of a woman. “I don’t think every woman needs to be a mother. I think it’s a personal choice, because being a woman is not just being a uterus. But if a person has children and is happy to be a mother and wants to talk about it, who are we to stop them? If you have an issue about not being a mother, don’t even go there,” she says.
This choice, agrees Radhika, is what the challenge is about. “I have lots of friends who don’t have children because they don’t want to have kids and want to put their careers first, and there’s nothing wrong with that. On Facebook you post photos of your kids all the time, only now you’re just saying it’s a challenge.”
