‘Multi-role’ models

His son may be one of Bollywood’s biggest stars ever, with a charity involved in activities ranging from earthquake relief to healthcare, but Salim Khan earlier this month, put it out there plain and simple — “Salman Khan is not a role model”.

 

The father couldn’t have explained it better either. “He is definitely not a role model for his brothers or anyone. Because Salman has always lived a very unstructured life without following any pattern.”

 

Which brings us to a few questions. How do we define the role model of today? Is one role model not enough? How do we arrive at picking a role model? There’s also the whole ‘craft vs character’  debate. An aspiring golfer may have Tiger Woods’ poster up on a wall but Woods for ‘husband of the year’?… Probably not.

 

Obviously then, there are thousands who worship Salman, the actor. The man has forged a stellar career after all. Some may say, except for his off-screen headlines, he’s even “perfect”. 

 

When asked to explain today’s ‘role models’ experts are wary too. Professor Daniel David, Head of English Department at Madras Christian College, warns that idolising a single person for all aspects of your life can be dangerous. David says, “Role models keep changing as you become mature. We are complex beings so if you admire only one person, there’s a high possibility of putting that person on a pedestal and treating him or her like a demi-God. Creating the image of a superhuman is dangerous.” 

 

Social analysts suggest that it’s safer to have separate idols for different parts of your life and it’s better to look up to virtual personalities based only on their professional expertise. An aspiring cricketer may idolise Sachin Tendulkar or a struggling musician, A.R. Rahman. 

 

Delhi-based clinical psychologist Pulkit Sharma feels it’s alright to have more than one role model. “For instance, to achieve your personal goals, you should look up to someone who’s in physical contact with you and who you know personally like your parents,” Pulkit says.

 

Today’s generation thinks highly of Dr A.P.J. Abdul Kalam as his life is inspiring; even Prime Minister Narendra Modi comes a close second. These leaders made an effort to interact with students, when others barely bother. Mrs J. Ramadevi, principal of Kendriya Vidyalaya, Uppal, says, “Students should look for a role model who can balance his professional and personal lives well. He/she needs to have high standards of moral value, apart from being service-oriented. In today’s times it’s difficult to find such a versatile personality.” 

 

David says that biographies can also be of immense help, for the perfect role model, as they cut across time and space. “We need to find a strong reason for the person we want to emulate. After all, we are all human and no one is perfect,” David says.