Understanding sexual abuse

Chennai: He was the man she trusted the most. He would cook meals for her, drop her to school and sing a lullaby to put her to sleep and under the blanket he would run his hands on her body, “inappropriately”.

Krithika with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) was 13 when her guardian raped her in her own house and her mother would always think the reason Krithika wailed when she left home every morning was her disorder.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), approximately 1 in 6 boys and 1 in 4 girls suffer from sexual abuse before the age of 18. Studies show that a child with any type of intellectual disability was four times more likely to be sexually abused than a child without disabilities.

In most cases, school teachers identify sexual abuses as they keenly observe the child and behavioral change, if any. “There are many ways to find out if the kid is abused, out of which one is play therapy. A kid being sexually abused at home, might play with two dolls by putting them in inappropriate positions or continuously mumble his name under her breath,” said P. Gayathri, a special educator.

 As most of the kids are drawn to art, the colours they use will be darker and they might draw boxes to explain that something is restricting them to four walls, she further added.

An instructor on condition of anonymity said most of the incidences of sexual abuse happen at home or while they are travelling. “One of the students was molested by her auto driver and in another incident by her grandfather. Even parents choose to run away from reality as when we approach them with the problem, they simply change the school. This would only worsen the condition,” she said.

Special educators say the first step to being able to protect yourself is to know your rights and to know that your body belongs to you, and that you have control over it and what you do with it. When a child says “no” to an abuser, it shows that they understand the rules of touching and sexual behaviour and, very importantly, they are able to report it.

“Once the child gathers courage to talk about sexual abuse, parents and guardians have to listen carefully and not blame the child as he or she may get agitated, leading to selfharm. Then, consulting a doctor at the earliest is key,” said one of the special educators. 

Warning signs of sexual abuse among special children 
An increase in nightmares and/or other sleeping difficulties
 Angry outbursts
Anxiety
Depression
Difficulty walking or sitting
Withdrawn behavior
Pregnancy or contraction of a venereal disease, particularly if under age 14
Propensity to run away
Refusal to change for gym or to participate in physical activities
Regressive behaviors depending on their age (e.g., return to thumb-sucking or bed-wetting)
Reluctance to be left alone with a particular person or people
Sexual knowledge, language, or behaviors that are inappropriate for their age.