The Doting games

In an age of dating apps where relationships don’t seem to last longer than a coffee date or your phone’s battery on that date for that matter, we are here to say that the charm of falling in love isn’t lost on us either. We hear it from young Bengaluru couples in long-term relationships whose cute stories, that are almost serendipitous, will most definitely give you the feels and make your day. Bonus: They also tell us how!

Geetanjali Chitnis knew Geeth Jason Vaz since she was only 13. Having dated the Lagori guitarist for eight years after connecting at an Aerosmith concert, they tied the knot last August.

“I’ve always been a big romantic. But I’ve realised that the definition of love keeps changing. We have to understand each others’ quirks and cannot set out to change them,” she says.

In most long-term relationships, you often hear the, ‘I want to give up’ or the ‘spark is lost’ complaints and Geetanjali says, it’s all about looking at the bigger picture. “I am very sentimental about Infinitea on Cunningham Road, because it was where we had our first dinner. It’s all about keeping the pattern alive and going back to doing things that once made you happy as a couple. Always works,” smiles the 26-year-old. Her pearls of wisdom?

“The scariest thing in a relationship is not knowing where it’s going — be open, upfront and honest about it,” she says, urging the young to have a little patience when things go south.

However sparkly a relationship, it always has its ups and downs. “We think we are one. We act like we are one. But we are two very different people and that’s quite challenging,” confesses actor, image consultant and life transformation coach Tamanna Pasha.

“We like to do different things and have different hobbies, for starters. Initially it felt like one of us had to give up something for the other, now we look for shared interests. If not, we agree to be unique and different,” she says. Now 27, Tamanna first met her husband Rafiushan Pasha, nine years ago.

“My father wanted to meet the guy who had swept me off my feet. My family met his, and my dad suggested we get engaged that very night! We did. I still tell my dad that he proposed to my husband, before my husband could propose to me!” laughs Tamanna, who also works with her husband in Plugg Networks, his nightlife company.

The couple believes that they are friends first and that it’s important to respect each others’ beliefs and feelings. “It’s really hard to meet the person that’s ‘right’ for you. It’s fun to explore when you are young. But you should also know when you meet the ‘right’ person. When that happens, it’s time to stop looking,” says Rafiushan.

If you’re going to blame the distance for falling out, they tell us that can’t be a reason either. Take 23-year-old Prateek Mehra, who has been in a relationship for over six years, for instance.

“Surviving an LDR was never easy — we’d fight over the tiniest of issues which we’d never faced when we were in the same city. Over time our personalities might change and that might get you to doubt the importance they hold in your life, but trust and understanding who they are at their core is essential to get through it, if you believe you’re meant to be,” he says.