When friends break up online

A lot of new challenges and trends emerge on Instagram, the picture perfect world. While some disappear before the beginning of a new day, some are here to stay!

With the changing times we seem to have adopted so many trends that lean significantly towards the negative side. One such trend that we have recently spotted is where youngsters delete pictures of their ‘ex-friends’ over a fight. It might even be followed by hate memes, leaving the person on the receiving end anxious and depressed. 

Sounds familiar? Youngsters in namma ooru nod their head in approval. They open up about having done something similar or being on the receiving end, and how it has affected them. 

Madhurima Deka, a senior business analyst, says “I have been at the receiving end of such treatment. One thing that is a given, people go to the extent of deleting your pictures from their feed or posting hate statuses that are meant for you once the fight/argument has reached its peak. The damage is not caused by deleting a picture, it happens much before that. The outburst on social media is only an aftermath. There are two ways of responding to it: turning a blind eye or through the same medium of hate. I chose the higher road and completely ignored it. Though I regret the argument and the loss of a valuable friendship, there isn’t much I can do.”

After a certain age, we all seem to surpass the feeling of betrayal. I can’t vouch that the age bracket is so-and-so or to what extent we have the power to control how much a person affects us. 

Abhishek Pde, a student from Jain College, seems to have hit rock bottom. He says, “I had a friend who betrayed me. He went behind my back and did things that no friend should. We were going through a rough patch and the fight was beginning to get ugly so I unfollowed him and blocked him on all social media platforms because I chose myself over him. He did the same; actually, he went a step ahead. He was posting hate statuses that were targeted at me and my friends; his friends even tagged us on it. I found it very petty but more than anything, I found it extremely hurtful and insensitive. I didn’t see this coming my way considering we had been best friends for three years. But, now I really don’t think I care.”

The effect of social media and how much we allow it to influence us is evident in our day to day lives. Neeta Pereira, head of department of psychology at St Joseph’s College, tells us that there are a huge number of students who approach her being troubled about the same. 

She says, “Relationships today have become very superficial. When you make a friend you are not concerned about caring for the relationship but what it does to your social status. That is the main reason why most relationships don’t last a long time. Youngsters also lack the ability to communicate their differences. A small fight is all it takes for them to give up. With regard to how such trends on social media can affect an individual, they might completely withdraw from taking part in any social activity. They also develop anxiety and several other trust issues which can affect them very negatively.”