Love becomes a stranger
By : Chokita Paul
Update: 2024-08-05 18:40 GMT
A recent survey sought to uncover the most resonant relationship advice given or received. The message that stands out is: “Love doesn’t require earning. You deserve it.” The guidance implores individuals to seek reciprocity, not just love. Observe whether the person demonstrates presence. Do their behaviours align with their words? Are they reliable at keeping realistic promises? Do they return kindness swiftly? Do they share your happiness and feel remorse for causing you pain?
Digital Intimacy
Relationships intertwined with technology are nearly impossible to avoid. The current dating culture, infiltrated by commodification. Dating apps provide more choices, more relationships, and more social opportunities than would otherwise be possible.
Relationships intertwined with technology are nearly impossible to avoid. The current dating culture, infiltrated by commodification. Dating apps provide more choices, more relationships, and more social opportunities than would otherwise be possible.
“Text-centric communication has also altered how we interact, making conversations less personal and more prone to misinterpretation. Virtual interactions have become the norm, setting new expectations and pacing for modern relationships. While technology has made dating more accessible, it has also reshaped it in ways that challenge traditional notions of intimacy and connection,” says consultant psychiatrist Dr Ashish Bansal.
Online dating is a chore
Dating apps feel more like a chore than they did when we first became single years ago, and yet we have no idea how to date without them. Alfie Bown’s concept of ‘desirevolution’, particularly in his book Dream Lovers: The Gamification of Relationships, explores how technology is reshaping our romantic and sexual desires. Over time, various social factors have shaped the way we approach love and relationships.
Online dating is a chore
Dating apps feel more like a chore than they did when we first became single years ago, and yet we have no idea how to date without them. Alfie Bown’s concept of ‘desirevolution’, particularly in his book Dream Lovers: The Gamification of Relationships, explores how technology is reshaping our romantic and sexual desires. Over time, various social factors have shaped the way we approach love and relationships.
At this stage, it seems inevitable, as Brown clarifies that ‘love is being absorbed into broader trends of growth.’ These algorithms influence our choices in dating, entertainment, and food, shaping new desires that ultimately favour the privileged. These algorithms have adopted the societal prejudices of those who developed them.
Dating & Hedonism
Hedonism values pleasure and desires over love, with various theories focusing on personal or holistic delight.
Dating & Hedonism
Hedonism values pleasure and desires over love, with various theories focusing on personal or holistic delight.
However, choosing a hedonistic lifestyle may lead to endless cravings and unfulfillment, says Sohini Rohra, a counseling psychologist and mental health advocate.
Love involves giving, shared experiences, and contentment. “Most of us even have a transactional relationship with ourselves. If we achieve certain goals, we deserve certain pleasures. Transactions are essential and unavoidable. They can motivate us, set boundaries, and allow us to live within ethical norms. But everything is healthy when it is in balance and has overall well-being in mind. Having said that, these transactions are based on certain fundamentals that define the relationship’s health, regardless of its transactional nature. A relationship based on love and companionship will entail healthy transactions, whereas one based on children, money, security, citizenship, revenge, and so on will entail unhealthy transactions, and this is where intimacy and emotional connections get deterred. When the intent of the relationship changes, it changes the nature of the transaction, percolating into the health of the relationship and therefore declining or enhancing the relationship,” says Sohini.
On average, users spend 51 minutes a day on dating apps, with women averaging 52 minutes and men 49 minutes. Experts recommend limiting usage to 30 minutes a day and taking breaks to reduce fatigue.